Calm down

Yeah, Yeah, I'll tell you a few more jokes.

Do you know why Rump Roast is called Rump Roast? Because, nobody'd eat it if they called it Cow Ass!

I grew up in a town so small that the town prostitute was a virgin.

Canada has the only Navy that can be underwater and on fire at the same time.

Remember when weed was the drug of choice? Now it's Extasy, or X. They tell you, "It'll make you want to have sex!". Hell, I'm a guy, cornflakes make me want to have sex, why the hell should I pay you thirty bucks for that?

Ever try to change a diaper on a baby that doesn't want to have his diaper changed? It's like trying to put Barbie's spandex pants, on a cat, in a jacuzzi!

Now, my cousin Bill isn't that great of a shot. Not handy with a gun, I'm saying. I took him bird hunting. I got 23 birds in under an hour, and he didn't get any. I asked, "What the hell is wrong with you?" Bill said, "I guess I'm not throwing the dog high enough."
Yeah, we got kicked out of the Zoo for that one. Hell, I didn't know penguins could fly either!

Don't worry the birthday recap is coming soon. Also, softball season starts this weekend, barring rain.

Jim